Tuesday, December 18, 2012

For Maggie

    This is difficult to write.  Maggie did not survive to see Christmas this year.  C.J. called me yesterday morning to let me know, and I knew what he was going to tell me when I took the phone from Belinda; he had never called me before on the morning of a school day.  I had also never heard him so upset, but it made perfect sense...Maggie was like an adopted daughter to C.J. and Lynne. 
    A darkness was already hanging over our family, our community, and our city because of the tragic school shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut and all of the national coverage that went along with it.  Hearing about Maggie's death dropped my spirits even lower and brought my thicker skin to the surface.  I had to go to school and face my students, set an example, be tough.
    I maintained my harsh exterior until I got home.  Danielle was working on her personal narrative.  I sat on the couch above her since she was sitting on the floor.  I rubbed her arm and thought about Bruce.  Guilt overwhelmed me.  Love for my daughter overwhelmed me.  I could not picture a world without my daughter.  Here she was alive, sitting right in front of me.  Bruce (and Diane) no longer have their daughter.  I am filled with sorrow. 
    My only optimistic thought is that I know they would not trade the time that they had together for anything.  They have that, and no one can take that away from them.  I am thankful for Maggie's life and for knowing her.  Maggie's wish was that her family would get together for Christmas.  It may not have turned out the way Maggie had envisioned, but in a unique and inexplicable way they did come together as a family this Christmas. 

    I immediately became a member of Maggie's blog when I heard she had died, and I left a comment for her and her family.  It is linked to this blog, and it will always remain there.  We will miss you, Maggie.    
         

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